OK.. so far we have the following.. Please feel free to add we have a way to go t'ill we hit but I think we can do it
penfolduk : 1. Cant be arsed lol
penfolduk : 2. your "cat" died
goblinshimm : 3.Dog ate me car keys..
stumpy_dan : 4: I was kidnapped and have only just got free
tomtomks : 5.constipation has made me a walking time bomb
stumpy_dan : 6: I was called away on a top secret mission for Queen and country
tomtomks : 7. my wife makes more money than me so i have to stay home and look after our sick dog